The Worst Marketing Pitch in the World

Baskin Robbins’ tagline “Where Wonders Never Cease” was perhaps the most overblown and mismatched marketing ploy in history (after all, it’s only ice cream). But the 2013 marketing pitch from Destiny USA shopping mall takes the cake. Fear not, as we cut through the clutter to deliver the real message behind what could very well be the worst marketing pitch in the world.

It began as a thought: can we hide consumerism and capitalism behind 90 seconds of a self-congratulatory, pseudo-spiritual, life-affirming testament?
A thought that turned into an idea: consumers are gullible, uneducated sheep.
An idea that transformed into a dream: can we market a shopping mall with complete BS?
Sometimes that’s how horrible marketing happens.
Over and over…
A gasp…
A lack of faith…
And in the blink of an eye it’s begun…the worst marketing pitch in the world.
Something so ridiculous…
You ask yourself, is this possible?
It takes greed.
It takes a total lack of vision and imagination.
And the spinelessness to do something that has always been done.
What it takes is sheer disregard and uncompromising deception.
This is the mission to destroy a market and devalue our culture.
This is a promotion social media will ridicule for generations to come.
And this is the nightmare that is our destiny.
We will relive it today and tomorrow.
It’s about distancing people all over the world.
It’s about knowing that where you are going you will be cheated.
And it’s about making life miserable, one false promise at a time.
This is their lie…
This is their disbelief…
This is the worst marketing pitch in the world.

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